put it in my mouth


HOMEMADE OREOS: CLOYING OR SICK-RIDICULOUS?
May 27, 2010, 1:08 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

The answer to the above is sick-ridiculous, but it took me a minute to come to this conclusion. I’ve wanted to make oreos for a while, but what kind of an asshole would make oreos? You could get a really big box of Double Stuf at Duane Reade for $3.99 and they would be delicious. Making them from scratch seemed a little too precious, a little too much.

Whatever. I’m over it, and I’m glad, because these were awesome! I got the recipe from Wayne Bachman’s “Retro Desserts,” which is posted here. I back Deb’s spot-on suggestion that the sugar be reduced to about a cup; I also added a pinch more salt than was called for, which is a move I stand by. Also, making the cookies a day ahead is the way to go, because it allows them to become the right amount of stale.

Also, for those who are curious, the filling of the original Oreo cookie is no longer made from pork fat—it’s made with an undisclosed mix of vegetable oils in the Kraft/Nabisco factory in Richmond, Virginia. Knowledge is power!

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MERRIAM-WEBSTER: HOPELESSLY OUT-OF-TOUCH OR WAY AHEAD OF THE CURVE?
May 9, 2010, 9:52 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

Also, I’m not quite sure why Merriam-Webster believes that the noun “stew” is more commonly used to describe a whorehouse than it is to describe something akin to a thick soup, but I am prepared to roll with it:

Main Entry: 1stew

Pronunciation: \ˈstü, ˈstyü\

Function: noun

Etymology: Middle English stewe heated room for a steam bath, from Anglo-French estuve, from Vulgar Latin *extufa — more at stove

Date: 13th century

1 obsolete : a utensil used for boiling
2 : a hot bath
3 a : whorehouse b : a district of bordellos —usually used in plural
4 a : fish or meat usually with vegetables prepared by stewing b (1) : a heterogeneous mixture (2) : a state of heat and congestion
5 : a state of excitement, worry, or confusion



TOMATO CHICKEN AND RICE STEW
May 9, 2010, 9:45 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I never really got the appeal of chicken and rice soup—the rice always felt lost in too much broth, and chicken noodle always seemed a better, wiser alternative. This soup changes everything: add in some tomato and make sure to use brown rice, everything melds together in the way you really need it to, and then you’ve something truly spectacular. And I write this with the full understanding that it is way past chicken soup season.

1 whole chicken (about 4 lbs.)
4 cups broth
1 large can crushed tomatoes
1 small can tomato paste
4 carrots
1 onion
3 stalks celery
1 ½ c. brown rice*
3 bay leaves
Garlic, as much as you are willing to tolerate
Cayenne pepper
Salt to taste

Chop up the vegetables and mash the garlic. Combine all ingredients in a very large soup pot. Add water to the pot until the chicken is fully covered. Bring the soup to a boil, and then reduce heat to a slow boil. Keep this up for an hour. When the chicken meat is about to fall off the bone, remove the chicken from the soup and drain in a colander until cool. Remove the meat, discarding the bones and skin. Chop meat and return to the pot. Stir and add salt if necessary.

* Use only 1 c. of brown rice if you want it more like soup and less like stew.